backport: bitcoin#25717, #25960, #25978, #26012, #26172, #26184, #26355, #26387, #26954, #30761 (anti-DoS headers sync)

backport: bitcoin#25717, #25960, #25978, #26012, #26172, #26184, #26355, #26387, #26954, #30761 (anti-DoS headers sync) #7524